Inclusive Lexicon for 500, Please.

A long, long time ago - sometime last year - I was at the Utah Pride Center. I was there to support a friend's tobacco prevention organization to get LGBT young people involved in taking a stand against Big Tobacco. While everyone was standing around the pizza socializing, the conversation somehow shifted to how an individual wasn't afraid of doing something that the rest of the group wasn't willing to do (the details are obviously fuzzy...). This person ended with something along the lines of, "you guys are just p-----s" (Just trying to keep it G rated, but the word is a vulgar term for female genitalia that, today, is used as a derogatory term to tell someone that they are weak, unable, afraid, etc... if that helps figure out what was said). Another person quickly responded said, "let's unpack that word. What about this group is a vagina?"

While said somewhat in jest, the intent was to draw attention and critical thought to a commonly used word that others may find offensive, especially since it attaches a negative meaning (weak, afraid, etc) to an aspect of womanhood. This is similar to other common terms, like "gay" or "retarded." Of all the things to say, why pick something that is demeaning to a group of people? Granted, most people are using these words out of habit or because it is a common/popular term and are not intending to cause harm or dehumanize a group of people. They are used out of innocence or in an effort to fit in. But they often still make others feel uncomfortable and belittled.

Now that we have that established, I want to change pace a little and bring up the response: "Let's unpack that word." I tend to hear this phrase often when associating with "inclusive circles" and those attempting to create safe spaces. It is an effort to dissect a commonly used word or phrase and understand its true meaning and whether it was accurately used in the situation. Perhaps a better, less offensive word, could be substituted: a euphemism. So, when someone says, "that's so gay!" a common response would be, "let's unpack that word... What about this conversation/activity is homosexual? How is this topic dealing with anyone's sexual attraction? Did you mean...?"

You get the idea.

That critical thought is a soft approach to help minimize or remove future offenses. We all want to feel included and not many people want to be outright offensive. So, we talk about things.

And now to my main point: I feel that the majority of my friends and associates who are seeking to be inclusive tend to look past a few offensive words. While being quick to "unpack" how "that's so gay" can be offensive, these people are also quick to use often offensive swear words in their casual conversation and brush it off as "free speech" or "a matter of expression." Many people find swear words offensive, otherwise they would not be categorized as a swear word. Yet because it isn't directly affiliating a descriptive word of a group (i.e., retard) to a negative connotation (i.e., stupid, incapable, broken), it does not need to be "unpacked" and removed from one's lexicon for an unoffensive euphemism. Like I mentioned earlier, generally speaking, most people are not saying these things to be offensive, but many people are offended. Perhaps we can all work on being more inclusive by what we say...?

I hope I am making sense. Is this a valid concern? Is it a valid point of discussion?

Let's unpack this.

I shall call you, Evey.

9 pages in my journal today... you know something crazy is happening... especially since the last time I wrote was January 2011.

The end.


PS: I bought a new car yesterday! She's a 2009 Toyota Camry Hybrid. Her name is Evey. In the words of my niece, "it looks like a spy car." She is black with dark tinted windows... Keyless entry and push to start... I feel like I am driving a luxury car! AND, if I drive eco-friendly (get a high enough average mpg for the drive), she congratulates me! It's like playing a game every time I get in the car... On the way to work this morning, I got over 40mpg almost the entire way... I got an, "EXCELLENT!" from her. She makes me feel good about myself. :)

Ten Months Later, or, To Share Or Not To Share

It's crazy to think that the last time I posted on my blog was ten months ago. Life was terribly different back then as compared to today - though many of those around me will not recognize the difference in me, my life, or anything else for that matter.

But things are pretty different.

My current feeling goes something like this: a blend of fear, anxiety, excitement, and childish giddiness are burning in my chest, while my stomach turns with a sense of hunger and stirred butterflies. I want to smile. I want to laugh. I want to cry and throw up a little bit. But, I want to talk to someone about the great things of life and the joys of Jesus and the intense aloneness I have felt in the past.

I want to share it all.

And then, of course, that leads me to a greater fear that my words will fall on ears closed and boarded up, a mind unable to understand the excitement and absurdity that is my life. 

The reel-to-reel in my mind plays it out perfectly. I dish it out on fancy plates with silver spoons. It's devoured - with the guest begging for a recipe and the intricacies its existence! And the giddy fear with a side of excitement and a glass of anxiety are no longer kept to myself, but has been consumed and absorbed by someone else. Mutual confusion, euphoria, and honest terror of what the future brings. 

The experience is one for the record books, let me tell you!

The performance in my mind enhances the previous emotions to the point where I am comparable to a teenybopper who just got backstage to her heartthrob's concert.

Yet, without fail, the fear of a miscalculated sentence or a fatefully closed mind overcomes the delight of the played and replayed scene.

What is a troubled soul to do?

If it was anyone else sharing this experience to me, I would be ecstatic to say, "Go for it! What is there even to question!?" But, since it is me who has to do the talking, the faith has yet to overcome the fear.

On a lighter note...

My life is incredible. Aside from the battle waging in my heart and soul as described above, things are going pretty perfectly. I am overcoming odds and challenging systems. And, as cliché as it may sound, The Man Upstairs is all to blame.

If you would have compared the Me of June 6, 2012 to the Me of June 19, 2012, we would be doppelgängers on the outside, but antonyms within. I guess you could say that Who I've Been has claimed vengeance on Who I Am, so that Who I'll Be can rise to fruition. It's like a Hollywood blockbuster. For real. Maybe we could call it September Came.

There is something to be learned in His wise words: "Pray always, that you may come off conqueror." (D&C 10:5) "...Lift up your heads, and rejoice, and put your trust in God..." (Mosiah 7:19) "...Walk in my statutes, and keep my commandments, and do them..." (Leviticus 26:3)

Call it snake oil, call it placebo, call it the Truth of the Universe. Whatever you want to call it, it works more than you would ever begin to imagine. Go ahead, give it a shot. I triple dog dare you.

Confused yet? Good.

PS: Ecstaticism isn't a word. I tried.

Wow.

I don't even know where to begin... How 'bout the night of my last update.
So, I was giving my update of the day at McDonalds, right? About that time, I decided I might want to figure out what I was gonna do for the night. I figured that since I hadn't made any contacts that day, I better give up on the hope for a nice shower before bed on a comfy couch... I found a little Baptist church down the street and decided that it would do for a nice place to spend the night. I pulled in... it seemed safe enough... so I parked under a "TOW AWAY ZONE" sign and got ready for bed. I don't remember if I mentioned my state of being that night. I was sticky, sweaty, sunburned, tired, sandy, etcetera, etcetera. I felt worse than disgusting. I cracked my windows just enough to let some airflow in, but to keep bad guys out, and closed my eyes. Eyes open, eyes close... eyes open, eyes close. Open, close. It was ridiculously hot in the car all night long, the back seat of my car was covered in sand from the beach, and it was probably the most uncomfortable situation. EVER.

Bottom line: I didn't get much sleep.

Day 13 - June 23:
Morning came, and with minimum sleep, I took off to find a bathroom. I drove an awkwardly long time to find a gas station, and when I did, the gas station only had port-o-potty. There goes my chance for a sink bath! I was right next to the beach, so I figured I would walk down the beach to find a beach shower. I walked for quite a while before I found a shower, but I found one, nonetheless! Now that I knew where a shower was, I headed back to my car to get my stuff. On the way, I found a little place called Noah's Ark Beach Ministry. On the sign it said, something about a gift shop, free wifi, and concerts every night, so I decided to go in for a minute to look around. I met a couple nice people and took a look around the gift shop and was on my way. I got back to my car and started driving towards the beach shower, but decided to go back to the little ministry. I walked in and awkwardly asked for a shower. I told them what I was doing with the Vagabond Tour, gave them some flyers, and they showed me to a shower! I don't think I have appreciated a shower more in my life! I felt so so so disgusting, and to be clean felt like heaven!  I definitely owe Noah's Ark Beach Ministry some service! Great Christlike people that deserve many blessings.

When I left, I headed up to Panama City to meet up with Travis Nellums! We met at an LDS church, where it just so happened to have a zone conference going on! We went in and said hello to all of the missionaries, and I made some contacts to make sure the missionaries would let me go teach with them. :)

Then, I hopped in Sandy (Travis' car), and Travis drove around while I tagged along. We went to play frisbee golf, to the mall to find him some sunglasses - while there, we would talk to people about the vagabond tour and hand out flyers - and got something to eat. Oh, we went to every thrift store in Panama City... Dang! Then we went to play some volleyball with a bunch of strangers. When he was dropping me off at my car to go our separate ways, he casually says something like, "why don't you just come stay at my place for the next few days?" We discussed it, laughed about possibilities, and I ended up emptying my car and loading everything into his car... all at about 11pm in a church parking lot. I put my signs in the windows ("STAY POSITIVE, YOU'RE AMAZING," "The Vagabond Tour" and "Pray for the haters") in hopes that they would deter anyone from towing or breaking in. Once his car was full of my stuff, we hit the road to Chipley! I must say, while driving with Travis, we had some of the best laughs! He even laughed so hard that he spit his soda all over himself and his car. Today had one of the worst mornings of my life, and one of the best evenings. Funny how that works out! God is good.

Day 14 - June 24:
I would like to think that I slept in, but I honestly don't even know what that means any more! I woke up at my regular 8am-ish time... got ready, and actually snuck out while everyone else was sleeping to go spend most of my day with the missionaries. We went to do some service at a Habitat for Humanity thrift store. After helping out there for a couple hours, we were on our way, refueled, and went knocking doors. It started to rain terribly bad, so we went back to the apartment and had a "family study." We talked about mission statements / mottos, the Second Coming, the book of Revelation, and a few other things. GOOD TIMES! I miss my mission like CRASY!
I left after the family study to go have some fun in Pensacola with Travis. As I was walking back to the house from the missionaries place, I was the witness of a tragic accident. A little puppy was running across the street and got hit by a car. I still cant get the sound of the experience out of my head... ugh. It made me literally sick and I was in shock for a while. I couldn't speak. One of the worst parts was that the car didn't stop... they just kept going. Before I could get to the dog (it was still alive), the owners ran out to it and took it into the house. I just slowly walked with my hands going from over my mouth to my ears, to my forehead, to my heart... It wouldn't stop replaying in my mind. Please pray for that little dog. :(

Other than the above experience, the rest of the day was quite enjoyable. The 2 hour drive to Pensacola was hilarious (for as much as I could stay awake for)! We got to Pensacola a little late, but got to see a bunch of owls at a sanctuary before the sun went down. After that, we went to Swing Night. I felt like I walked into the 40's. People were dressed up in their swing garb, swing music was blasting through the speakers, and they had clips of old swing dancers being projected onto a big screen. Woah. It was an interesting night! I played Wallflower and people watched in this strange environment. There are perks to being a wallflower, people.

Day 15 - June 25:
The Panhandle Watermelon Festival! Woot! There was a parade in the morning, but I decided to bypass the parade so that I could do my laundry (hooray for clean clothes!!!) and try to get some writing in. It wasn't very long before they were back and we headed to the festival. I brought my FREE HUGS sign and we walked around for a while. I got about 20-25 free hugs, which is pretty good for being a total stranger in a small town! I also got a free oil change. The first person I gave a hug too was at a booth selling cars. He thought the Free Hugs concept was brilliant, and wanted to show his support to The Vagabond Tour, so he gave me a card for a free oil change. SCORE! Thank you so much, good sir!
We got some free watermelon, watched a watermelon auction and the top selling watermelon went for $700! A WATERMELON! That was the first watermelon, with the rest dropping about $50 each watermelon. Those are expensive watermelons!
After we had seen what there was to see and hug who wanted a free hug, we headed back (I stopped by to see how the dog was doing. It is alive and mostly well - just a messed up leg), dropped off the kids, and headed down to Panama City. We got together with some other people (5 of us total), and played some frisbee golf. Then we went and hung out at an ice cream shop. We had the time of our lives - laughing, joking, telling stories, etc. After that, we went back to the church to check on my car to see if it had been towed, but to our relief, it was still there! We hung out at the church for a bit, and I tried to convince Travis to sleep down in Panama City as a bum with me... but he wouldn't buy it. Bummer. They went on their way, and I stayed at the church. They had a little picnic area, so I got my "bed" together on top of a picnic table, and drifted off to sleep.

Day 16 - June 26:
I slept surprisingly well on the table! I felt like I had slept through a rainstorm because I was so wet from the humidity and morning dew, but it wasn't a bad experience! The only bad thing: My phone somehow broke. I don't know if I slept on it and broke it that way, or if the humidity/wetness had something to do with it, but now when I push some of the buttons, it does random things. Like, when I hit the "return" button, it opens the camera first, then the phone keypad. It is just one big mess. I hope I can still get it to function normally (other than the few newfound kinks...).
I got ready for church in the parking lot, and waited and waited for people to start showing up, but to now success. Someone finally pulled in, drove around and then drove off... then they came back and told me that they changed the meeting time. Hmmm... So now I am in the classiest McDonalds I have ever seen! Seriously, people. Let me describe this to you: there is a fireplace, a huge flatscreen tv on the wall, an X-Box and Playstation, really nice marble walls and tiled floors, leather armchairs, fancy booths, A bronze statue of Ronald McDonald, a kiddie section with hamburger chairs, etc. This place is intense! Oh, and of course, free wifi! :)

And there you have it! I hope I didn't bore you!

Until next time,
Peace.Love.Music.
Peter.Moosman.

Update Overload?

Its me again. I am finding that it is hard to stay consistently busy for every waking hour (especially when you stink and are all sticky and gross). Since it has been a challenge to stay busy, I am gracing those who actually read this with another update.

Day 12 - July 22:
Well, I found a place to stay last night, but had to be out by 5:30am. Something is better than nothing, right?!
Since I up so early, I went over to the beach and tried to sleep there for a bit. Harder than I thought! Beaches are hard... and sandy!
When I couldn't "rest" anymore, I got up and started walking down the beach, picking up any trash I could find - finishing when I realized I hadn't eaten breakfast and my stomach was hungry.
After breakfast, I went to the Panama City Beach Visitors Center to see if they could help me find some organizations to volunteer with the area. All they did was give me the phone book to take with me. They also gave me a $5 off coupon to Winn Dixie, so I went over there and got some more food to hopefully hold me up for the rest of my stay here.
I then headed for some shade so that I could look through the phone book and maybe make some calls... only to find that it is nearly impossible to find shade in this city! If there is some shade, it is "Private Property." Sad day... Luckily, I found one on the OPPOSITE side of town. I parked and started going through the phone book...
... When I was awoken by a homeless guy wanting money! The heat is exhausting and I had dozed off... Anyway, I was able to talk with the homeless man - Matthew - for a while, share some of my food, and interviewed him. It was a good time had by all!
After that, I decided to go back to the beach... this time to swim... for the first time in probably a decade or longer! And when I say swim, it wasn't so much of swimming or having a party in the Gulf... because it was pretty shallow for a ways out, and its hard to have too much fun all alone! Instead, I tried to have a somewhat spiritual experience... Just me and the millions of gallons of salt water. I stood in the water and felt the various pulls of the currents near my feet and near the surface, and everywhere in between. As the waves crashed into me, I found it interesting that I had little to no affect on them. They would pound into me and keep on going. A few thoughts...
- I am nothing. In the grand scheme of thing, I am totally nothing... just a small piece of something much greater. But, just like the ocean, it takes millions of single droplets of water to create the ocean. I am just a kid, but it starts with just one to make a difference that can change the world.
- Work with, not against, the stronger power. There is no way that I could fight against some of those huge waves. I would dig my feet into the ground, but I would still be pulled towards them. Why try to fight against that kind of a force? It was much better to lift my feet, float in the water, and rise and fall with the waves (except for the really big ones - then I would have to jump to clear them)
- Stay afloat. When I wasn't paying attention, I would get pounded by a huge wave, get salt in my mouth and eyes, and it wasn't much fun... When I was paying attention, I was able to move with the water - jump over the waves, move with the currents, and steer clear of the burning eyes!
- Laugh at the extra baggage. So, when I got back to my car, I realized that my pockets were not empty. When I put my hands in, I realized that my front pockets were full of algae, and my back pockets were full of sand. LOTS O SAND. I was puzzled at how that even happened, but had to laugh! Granted, I did not want that stuff to come back to the car with me, but they did. I could have gotten frustrated and upset, but that wouldn't have done anything for me, so I decided to laugh it off!

So, there you have it. When you look for learning experiences, you can get them! Even though I am not really enjoying the extra baggage of being sunburned, sweaty, sticky, and covered in salt, sunscreen, and algae.

Anyway, since I don't have a towel to clean me off from that experience, I decided to walk along the beach and clean again until I dried off! I got quite a bit further down the beach this time before I had hunger strike again... I headed to the parking lot of McDonalds, used their restroom to wash my arms off (something is better than nothing, right?!) and then headed back outside for a yummy dinner of canned spaghetti-o's, canned beans, and chips. Mmmm!

And now you know my day! I hope y'all aren't getting bored of this! It has only begun!

Update #2

So, I can tell that updates will be inconsistent... so I am going to refrain from weekly updates. Who knows when I will have internet, so I am going to update WHEN I GET THE CHANCE!

Anyway...

Day 8 - June 18:
My last post talked about most of this day, but to recap, I left Winchester, drove through TN, NC, and into GA. In Knoxville, I had a nice conversation and interview with a lady in the parking lot of McDonalds. Come Georgia, I had quite the experience!
I decided to go visit a friend who was serving an LDS mission in Cornelia, Georgia. I had made contact with some people in Cornelia, and they had invited them over around the time I was getting into town. I pulled in, and as I was hiding my car, he ([Elder] Kelton Gubler) pulled up. I ran around the house to avoid being seen, went inside and slipped into a back room. They came in and were visiting with the accomplices when I casually walked into the room.
"Oh, hey guys..."
Kelton does a double take... "PETER?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? Guys, this is my neighbor!"
The look on his face was PRICELESS. He was speechless for the entirety of our visit as well. He would just look over and stare... then shake his head with a big grin on his face. He asked silly questions like, "How did you get here?"
"Uh... my car."
I told him about The Vagabond Tour, took a picture with him, and then it was kind of strange awkwardness... So I asked if I could help them teach or something before I left. Luckily, they let me come!
After spending the rest of the evening teaching a guy named Bruce, we parted ways. It was SO SO SO GOOD to see Kelton again. He is a stellar missionary. A great example of what the Praise Project is all about as well.
So, I take off for Georgia, thinking I was running behind schedule (I was staying with someone from CouchSurfing.org), so I was booking it down the freeway. I get to Atlanta, and he let me know to take my time. Hmmm...! I am glad he did though because of what transpired next.
I figure I better get some gas, so I start aimlessly looking for a gas station. When I find one, I found a lot more than gas! I pull in, and when I get out of the car, I hear some loud rap music. I take a look around and I notice a little shop attached to the gas station called "Black Hollywood Media" in a nice community some would call "the hood" or "the ghetto." I fill up and was sitting in my car texting or something before driving off, when I get a knock on my window. "Whats the Vagabond Tour?"
I get out of the car and explain it to her, giving her a flyer and explaining Invisible Children and The Praise Project. She was impressed because she told me to get a stack of my flyers and follow her. We went to her store (Black Hollywood Media), swapped info, and she put my flyers on the counter to help advertise. SCHWEET! We talk for a while about a bunch of different things, I interview her, and I just hang out for a while in the middle of the hood. It actually felt pretty great - that is, being somewhere unexpected and seemingly "unsafe" but feeling completely comfortable and safe. Some people are completely misunderstood. That is all!
Anyway... When it was time to head out from there, I took of to find my CouchSurfing.com friend, who was finishing up at a party. I showed up, met some people, hung out there for a bit, and then headed to my temporary home. He was also hosting two people from Germany who were visiting the states for a few months. We had some good conversation, and then I dozed off from exhaustion.

Day 9 - June 19:
I slept in an hour or two, and took of to church. I roll in and there was only a car or two in the parking lot... Stake Conference. Luckily, one of the other cars knew where they were going! I was able to follow them far far away to another church building where, oddly enough, a gentleman spoke from my mission! The Stake President in Lexington, Kentucky was called to the Quorum of the 70 and was speaking at the spot I was visiting... SMALL WORLD.
Afterwards, I headed toward Centennial Olympic Park to meet up with an organization I had gotten in touch with online for a Free Hugs event. I showed up, walked around with my sign looking for them... no luck. I found a Marriott down the street and hopped online to see if they cancelled the event. I searched and searched for them online, but nothing. OK? So, I got back in the car and headed to my next destination. Montgomery, Alabama. I met some nice people on the state line who were headed down to help build houses for tornado victims. I would love to find something like that to do while down here.
Funny story: I took the "Mulberry Street" exit and just drove... I took a few turns and noticed a little plaque. I rolled right in front of Martin Luther King Jr.'s home. What are the odds of that?! It was definitely a nice little town and would love to return one day.
Fast forward a bit and I arrive in Chipley, Florida, home of the Nellums family. I was a missionary with Travis Nellums. It was a blast hanging out in that little country town with that crazy family. That night, Travis took me on a tour of Chipley. After 5 minutes,  we were headed home! To close off the night, I showed the Blue Roseline Bracelet DVD from Invisible Children to some of the family.

Day 10 - June 20
What a day! Travis and I drove to Fort Walton Beach, bowled a few games, played a game or two of pool, visited the beach, went to a Native American Temple Mound, and to a FHE potluck dinner. Woot!

Day 11 - June 21 (Today)
We had planned to sleep in, but as hard as I tried to sleep in, I was up before 9am... We drove down to Panama City Beach, walked around Pier Park - where I bought some flip flops (yeah, I cant believe it either...), walked on the algae infested beach (the gulf water is GREEN!), and walked along the main road to look at the attractions. Then we decided to go get something to eat... as we were pulling in to the parking lot of Little Ceasars, my car was acting really funny, and when we got back in the car, I noticed that the temperature gauge was to the top of the scale! We were right down the road from a car shop, so we headed straight there. Right as I was pulling in, the car died... :( Sitting half in the road, and half in the parking lot, I was able to get it started, and rolled up to the building... just as the car started to smoke. Turns out there was about $100 in repairs, but they were able to get it working again! Woot! I was NERVOUS that I was 3,000+ miles away from home without any transportation. Talk about one blessing after another blessing...
Now, I am sitting at a McDonalds. I was in my car, because I didnt want to get kicked out for loitering, but it got so hot that I couldnt stand it. Now it is late and I am outside basking in the warm summer night air. While sitting out here, I was visited by two homeless guys. They were probably in their mid 20s or 30s, and had mouths worse than sailors. We talked for a while, they told some stories of how they ended up on the streets (and how to get free coffee from McDonalds...), and they insisted on showing me youtube videos of heavy metal bands... I considered interviewing them, but I was worried about their language. That, and one of the guys was so baked that he was barely making any sense. The other guy volunteered himself to go to Africa and kill Joseph Kony and the Rebels when I told him about Invisible Children. Needless to say, I hope things work out for them and they are able to clean up their lives!
Well... I guess I better try to find out what I am going to do with my night... Where I am going to stay, and what I am going to do tomorrow! Keep it real! Keep praying! Keep doing good.

Peter.Moosman.

Week 1.143

Well, I have been away from home for a complete week (Sat morn to Sat morn). So, without further delay:

Day 1 - June 11: I hit the road at 8am. I drove and drove and drove. I took pictures and tweeted while I drove. I listened to the epic Vagabond Mixtape. I reached my first destination: Erie/Denver, CO. I visited with some relatives and went to dinner downtown with them. It was an honor to spend time with them (Shout out to the Bohns!) and walk the streets of such an incredible city and try to help a person or two. Then it was back on the road! Granted, I did get lost trying to get out of of the city... cause it was a big complicated one... Regardless, I drove and drove until I hit Sterling, Colorado. Sterling was where I slept... In the back of an LDS church parking lot in the back of my car.

Day 2 - June 12: I was able to stay for church in Sterling, which was a ward conference. I must say that the Stake President in that area is a spiritual rock star. He shared some of the most incredible messages I have heard in a long time! And they were much needed messages too, so that was even better!
After church, I hit the road again and drove through the road-trippers nightmare: Nebraska. It wasn't as bad as I had imagined it to be, but it was still pretty dang flat. I landed in Lincoln much earlier than I had planned, so I had lots of time for some relaxing and partying with my buddy Cody Oppermann. I got a nice tour of downtown Lincoln and the campus. Then we went home and watched the (Brown) Tony Bracelet DVD from Invisible Children. Good times were had by all! I got to crash on his comfy couch instead of my highly uncomfortable car. Thank you Cody!

Day 3 - June 13: After arising bright and early for the third day in a row (probably a record!), I hopped in my beautiful vehicle and headed eastward! As I drove over the Missouri River into Iowa, the rivers had been flooding, so I had to drive on the side-ish part of the road, since the other half of the freeway was covered in river. Yeah...
On this day, I drove through 4 states before noon. Nebraska, Iowa, Kansas, and Missouri. I stopped in Kansas City and wandered - trying to share my message of the Vagabond Tour. Harder than I thought. I left the city sweaty (HUMID!!!) and a little discouraged (I am not a missionary any more) and full of secondhand smoke (maybe I just came at the wrong time, but I was AMAZED at how many smokers there were. DANG.)
A little while later, I landed in the wonderful city of St. Louis! I went directly to the home of a gentleman I ran into on my mission by the name of Eddie Byrd! It was so good to visit with him! During our visit, I was able to show him the (Grey) Rescue Bracelet DVD and we had a nice little discussion afterwards on it. Schweet!
After leaving Eddies, I headed on over to a friend from college who happens to be living just outside of St. Louis: JaNae Stoddard. Talk about a freakin' rockstar (and a great story teller). We talked about the Vagabond Tour, religion, diversity, LGBT topics, cicadas, Invisible Children, and a plethora of other things. I must say that she was an EXCELLENT host (I slept on their couch). Thanks JaNae and friends for the great time.

Day 4 - June 14: To continue the record, I arose early, got ready, and snuck out while everyone was still sleeping, only to be faced with a long stretch of old pavement. While I drove a minivan drove by and a couple kids in the back seat took a bunch of pictures of me with their camera. OK? I was hoping they would post them on the facebook page, but nope.
Fast forward a wee bit and I roll on in to Kentucky! The greatest place on earth! I drive in and the first thing I see: The West End (of Louisville). I would have it no other way. :)
I didn't stop in the West End though, but rather headed back up into Indiana. I went to visit the one and only Marie Robertson of the Sacred Heart Catholic Church. Marie is one of the most charitable people ever. She is getting on the older side, and needs knee surgery, so she has been down and out for a bit - please pray for her health and Gods will for her. It was an excellent visit!
After that, I headed to the glorious West End. I was able to spend some time with Jerry Cox and Jim Coombs (awesome Portlanders). Then, I went on a search to find another person I had worked with and baptized as a missionary. I tried to find his number... it was shut off. I tried to stop by his old place... nobody was there. I tried finding his new place - He had mentioned the last time I talked with him that he had moved to a certain street - I drove up and down the street a couple times, then got out of the car and started talking to anything that moved if they knew him... no success. Finally, I thought I would go try a phone book at a gas station... no good. All that work and I wasn't able to see him. Super bummed. BUT! When I was leaving the gas station, I ran into someone I had known from way back when! We talked for a while, and I ended up going over to visit him and the family later on that day. What are the odds of running into someone at a gas station?! It was crazy.
After my run in at the gas station, I went over to see if my favorite person - Mike Thompson - was still living in the same place. As I was going up the stairs, a neighbor told me he wasn't there, but down at the liquor store on the corner... I went down there and found him sitting in the liquor store, smoking a cigarette and drinking. "Hey you're that Mormon boy, right?" We talked for a while and then were eventually on our way. It was sad to see him in the state he was in... Hmmm...
As I was headed to another church parking lot to sleep, I remembered that I was supposed to be on TV the next morning, so I tried calling my friend who had set it up to get the details. When she heard that I was in the West End and headed to sleep in a church parking lot, she used some strong language to tell me otherwise. I ended up sleeping in her guest room. Thanks Tara! I have such amazing friends.

Day 5 - June 15: For breakfast, Tara and I went to Nancy's Bagels, which was where we first met one fateful day in 2008. Afterwards, we cruised on over to the studio and I awaited my time on the air. I ended up going on and we talked about my experience coming home from an LDS mission and trying to stay actively involved in the community, first by starting Project: 1200 and then by now going on The Vagabond Tour. We talked about Project: 1200 for a bit and then talked about Invisible Children. It was such a great opportunity to have air time! (ps - I went on right before Paula Dean).
After the show, I headed to the mission office and mission home. I was able to do my own little "going home" interview with President and Sister Glende, since they are going home in a week or so. After our discussion, President Glende gave me a blessing and sent me on my way. It was such an honor to spend time with such an amazing couple.
I then hit the road for a drive out to the country to visit the Toombs family at their new home in the middle of nowhere. I got a little lost, and while trying to find the house, I totally saw a few goats kickin' it IN a broken down van on the side of the road. It was hilarious and definitely something you only see in the country. The visit with the Toombs (when I finally found them) was great!
I had to cruise back in to Louisville QUICKLY to make it to see the Gabays before they got too busy. It was a short visit, but definitely a nice one. (PS - Thanks for the pizza!)
My last stop in Louisville was the Emge residence. I crashed their dinner and was granted a delicious homemade popsicle. I even got to visit Brother Hanson, since he was over for dinner, and Newborn Emge, who... kind of just laid there the whole time. ;)
Then it was on the road again...
I arrived in Lexington pretty late in the evening and had a fantastic conversation with Armando Chavez, a close friend that I had met while a missionary. He actually managed the apartments that we lived in, so we saw him quite often.
Then... I slept.

Day 6 - June 16: After breakfast with Armando, he went to work and my explorations began.  I headed over to the Lighthouse Ministries just in time to help out serve lunch to those in need. Lighthouse Ministries is a little organization that we did service with every week while in Lexington. Though nobody I knew was there, the familiar routine and experience was definitely a great one.
I had to leave a little early so that I could catch some lunch for myself. This time, with Armando and the LDS missionaries. We went to Ramsey's, which has the Veggie Hot Brown - the worlds greatest dish. I don't think I have ever eaten anything so wonderful (so, of course I had to get it again)!
Afterwards, we all went our separate ways again, and I was able to meet up with Tyler Isaacs and Curtis Blevins (and Company) for a while. I baptized Tyler many many moons ago! Needless to say, it was great to see the gang.
Next, I went to the Blancett household! What an awesome and energetic family! It started off an empty home except for Tara, then as we were talking, people slowly showed up. About that time, Tara decided to call the missionaries over for dinner, followed by her and I going to pick them up.
After the food, I took the missionaries teaching! We taught a super intelligent lady named... Margurite? I dunno how exactly to spell her, but the whole thing was AMAZING. She accepted the invitation to be baptized when she knew things were true, and had a highly impressive vocabulary for her age. :)
When that glorious experience was finished, Armando and myself headed back over to the Blancett's, where we played cards and talked till about 1am! DANG!

Day 7 - June 17th: Woke up bright and early and headed over to visit with Steve Coffin, a guy I met in Winchester Kentucky. We talked about all kinds of things... The environment, changing the world, protests, Invisible Children, and about The Vagabond Tour. Then, we watched the (black) Sunday Bracelet DVD from Invisible Children and had a discussion on that. Good times had by all!
Following that visit, I met up with Armando and went to an Indian Restaurant for lunch, followed by our final farewell. Then I was off to Winchester!
In Winchester, I tried stopping by an old friend (who had moved, of course!) and then visited the old Winchester LDS Bishop's home. His daughter was home, and after a nice little conversation with her, I headed out with a plan to return for dinner.
I then called the missionaries and spent the next few hours with them. We knocked door after door. It was such a fantastic opportunity to go tracting again! We had some good conversation and has given me a brighter outlook on how things are going in this world! Missionary work is probably the greatest thing on the planet...
When my time with the missionaries were up, I headed back over to the Wells home and visited with them for quite a while! Over dinner, we talked about road trips, causes, Project: 1200 and a TON of other things. I got to hear some pretty crazy stories from the lives of the Wells. That night, I watched the (red) Emmy Bracelet DVD from Invisible Children with Nicole and had a pretty good chat about Invisible Children afterwards. I gotta say that the Wells are amazing people! Everyone I have had a chance to visit with have been OFF DA HOOK incredible. 'Nuff said.

THE END (of week 1)

---

Though it isn't part of the first week, I figured I would give a current update as well. I am sitting in the parking lot of McDonalds in Knoxvill, TN. This morning I visited with the Packs in Winchester, and this evening I will be visiting with (Elder) Kelton Gubler - From NSL, UT but serving an LDS mission in Cornelia, GA. I just had a heck of a drive to get to Knoxville, seeing as it has been storming something terrible since this morning. I have never hydroplaned like I have today. These roads are not suitable for driving in these conditions... but alas, I drive anyway!
I just got done chit chatting with a nice lady from Alaska about The Praise Project, Invisible Children, The Tour, and her story as a Native American fashionista/healer/smoker. It was definitely an interesting experience!
Alrighty then... my break time is definitely up. I think the storm I just drove through has passed on to my next stretch of road, so I will probably be driving in bad weather all over again! Woot!

Stay safe and healthy. Be good and kind. Take care!

peter.moosman.

The Vagabond Tour, or, My Life is About to Change Drastically

G'day.

The name's Peter. But you may already know that. I just hopped on to tell you a story about life - my life to be exact. It is an interesting one, and it is about to get a whole lot more interesting. Let me begin.


Hit the rewind button and we are taken back to March-ish. Around this time, I decided that I was going to go on an "extravagant vacation." I wanted to be a beach bum in Florida for a couple months. No responsibility, no due dates, no commitments. Just me, the beach, and... well... me. I distinctly remember mapping out my first draft of my trip on April 2nd. I spent the next month or so dreaming of the possibilities as I traveled the country. The risks, the excitement, and the memories made. I think a good word to describe me at this time was "giddy."

About the second week into May, my mind began to be uneasy about the trip. Not because it was unsafe or unwise to do it, but something I couldn't really describe. Just a simple uneasiness. I prayed a whole lot for direction to know what was needing to happen - whether I should cancel my trip, or plan something else... I wasn't sure! All I was sure of was that I felt God calling me to do something different.

I don't remember the date, but late one night, I couldn't really sleep. My mind had been racing about a bunch of random things. One of those things was how I was being a selfish person for spending so much time and money on this trip for no reason other than I WANTED TO... The next thing I know, I am googling information on Mother Teresa. I found a movie online about her and decided to watch it...

It starts with her as a nun in Calcutta, India. One day, she begins to feel that she should be doing something more... She eventually left her abbey to serve the poor. The rest of her life was dedicated to humanitarian efforts and the betterment of those suffering.

Needless to say, I shed a few tears and had A LOT on my mind. My mind was racing even more than it was earlier! I could no longer go on a vacation. I just could not be that selfish... God wanted me to know that I should be doing something else. I contemplated what that "something else" was for a while after that. It was driving me crazy! Should I donate all the money to a certain cause? Should I put my money into bettering my situation (education, work, etc.) so that I could help with something greater down the road? The praying didn't stop as I tried to figure out what God wanted me to do with my time and money.

One day, I get a little package in the mail. It was the long awaited Tony Bracelet + DVD from Invisible Children. I had been waiting for this for a while now [I had even called Invisible Children a couple times about it]. That night, I popped the DVD in my computer and began watching.

This documentary had a few stories within it. First, it summed up the efforts of Invisible Children and the history of the war going on in Central Africa. Second, it told the story of a man named Tony, whom has been tied to Invisible Children since the very beginning. Lastly, it told of a man named Nate Henn. Nate was a volunteer for Invisible Children. He quit his job and put his life on hold for roughly a year to travel across the US and spread the message of Invisible Children. While on tour, he was able to develop great friendships with Tony and others from Uganda. Well after the tours had ended and Tony had gone back to Uganda, Nate had the opportunity to go to Africa to see his friends. While there, he was caught in a terrorist bombing and was killed.

As the movie ended, I fought through my tears to face the answer that I had prayed for: I need to go on tour: The Vagabond Tour. I revised my trip to hit more major cities, and less of my vacation destinations. I started to create a vision for my summer, in which I would spend each day promoting a cause that can change and save lives. That, I feel, is what God is calling me to do this summer.

Most days, I will be sleeping in my car, eating at the mercy of others, and hopefully sparking a new light in the lives of complete strangers. I will be offering free hugs and thoughtful conversation, I will be showing Invisible Children DVDs as much as I can, and learning A LOT about myself and this huge community that I am wrapped up in. I hope to make a lot of friends along the way, experience a new life, and learn what God wants me to learn from this.

What better way to spend a month of my life? Lets take liberation to a whole new level. See you on the road!

[The Vagabond Tour 2011 is dedicated to Kyle Hutchings and Nate Henn. Their passion for life and service lives on.]

[Name Unavailable for the Sake of the Reader]

I have been here before.

Same thoughts.

Same emotions.

Same expletives.

Well, maybe different expletives.

This time, more intensive.

When I say I wanna escape,

Words can't describe

The direction.

The rapidity.

The destination.

Needless to say,

Who I've been hates who I am.

Who I've been hates who I am.

Discover the paradox displayed.

Thoughts.

Emotions.

Direction.

Destination.

Decipher the obvious or let me be.

Many Moons Later...

Well, fancy seeing you here! 

I hope you didn't think I died or anything, because I didn't. I just quit writing for a while... No reason as to why, but it just didn't happen. I guess I was busy.

Anyway, I suppose I will update you on a few things since my last update in February (I think...)

Here goes:

- Washington DC. I was there for 6 days, and while there I had THE TIME OF MY LIFE. It was so crazy to be able to see the monuments, the museums, etc. with such fun people!

- Holi Festival of Colors. Great times throwing colored chalk in the faces of strangers, all while learning about and enjoying a different culture.

- Engagements and Weddings. I swear, people are getting engaged (and/or married) left and right! My long time PGF left me for another man and now they are getting married. My greenie from my mission got married. A neighbor or two tied the knot. Friends and peers that I have gone to school with... DANG.

- We had our yearly family Easter Hunt. We went all around the valley and ended up at the Popes Table. A favorite tradition of mine. Thanks mom!

- I was asked to be in an art show, so since the 23rd of April, some of my homemade shirts have been on display! They will be in the show until the 31st of May. Crazy... My stuff is feet away from a national artist, whose art is selling for over $1000. Holla!

- Attended many celebrations. From rock concerts to pow-wows. My Chemical Romance, Coheed & Cambria, Neon Trees, & more. I must say that the pow-wow tops them all!

- Conference and Mission Reunion. It is always so good to see all my mission buddies. I miss the mission like crazy! Ugh!

- I started the Praise Project. Nuff Said.

- Planned my Vagabond Vacation. I am counting down the days that I get to hit the road and visit 21 states, including crossing off a bucket list item: Be a Beach Bum. I will be gone for over a month - traveling the country!

- My good friend Molly Anderson got home from her mission in San Bernardino California. Welcome home!

- I graduated! I am officially an Associates Degree holder as of May 5th. I graduated in Political Science.

That is all for now... Have a blessed day.

Senators, Representatives, Can You Hear Us?

I guess in this case, it is more, "can you hear me," but you get the point. Yet, I have talked with many constituents and they agree with the points I wish to relay to you at this time. These points deal with many of the issues that are facing lawmakers of this 59th Legislature in Utah. They are as follows:

Public & Higher Education. I think that it is safe to say that in order to get very far in our society, you need a degree of some sort. One needs education to find success in the eyes of America. That same education that opens the door to success is under attack on every level. Being a current student in a Utah institution of higher education, I know the struggles that students, faculty, staff, and administration face when there "isn't enough money." I have had to sit on the floor during a lecture. I have been the victim of shortfalls that come from the budget cuts. The proposed cut is 7%, but I urge you to do everything in your power to protect that budget.

Schools for the Deaf. Many of us don't know, and never will know, what it is like to be Deaf in a hearing world. Hearing people not only want to assimilate the Deaf into hearing schools, but encourage them to lipread and speak with their vocal chords. Deaf schools are successful in providing a positive learning experience, surrounded by people who can communicate with one another, and who can share and bask in an amazing culture. Please don't take away these schools.

Anti-Discrimination. Everyone deserves an equal opportunity to basic rights, regardless of race, gender/sex, sexual orientation, etc. SB 148 provides addresses the discrimination that is living in our state. Regardless of personal beliefs and values, everyone should be free from hateful and bigoted acts in the pursuit of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Immigration. I stand with, and support the ideologies in the Utah Compact, which was signed last November. I feel that the majority of immigrants are here for opportunity, growth, and the American Dream, just like the rest of us. If given the opportunity, they would pay state,federal, and income tax, along with any other requirement that it takes to be a citizen of this great nation. Unfortunately, we are living in a broken system and are in dire need of a reform. I don't see the solution in a law that forces people out of our society. I see it in an empowering society. If anything, OUR NATION needs to take more responsibility. After all, it is us who is providing jobs, housing, and other necessities of life for them. Please support a positive and healthy immigration reform, not a hurtful and fear-monging reform.


Tobacco Prevention and Control. This is my pride and joy. For this, I will fight till the bitter end. So many lives are affected by tobacco, both directly and indirectly. Probably the most affected demographic is the youth. This session, a couple bills will strive to protect Utah's youth from this deadly product.
The first: Protecting Children Riding in Motor Vehicles. Children who are in a vehicle with a smoking adult are being hotboxed with air 10x more toxic than what the EPA deems safe. This isn't about property rights. This isn't about parental rights. This is about health and human rights. Nobody should be forced to breathe in that concentrated air, let alone developing youth and children. Please support the health of Utah's children and vote YES on HB 89.
Second: It is obvious that Big Tobacco is targeting teens and kids. Look at their marketing and advertising of their product. Lately, they have been putting out products that mask the harsh burn of tobacco smoke with flavors like cherry, pineapple, and cotton candy. Susceptible teenagers and kids will fall prey to the deadly tricks of Big Tobacco, and so we need to take a stand to protect them. Vote YES on HB 170
Lastly: The Budget. As odd as it is, the Tobacco Prevention and Control Program is constantly on the chopping block. The odd part is that it should be the only one that is safe every year. In 1998, Utah sued the major tobacco companies, and is now in a settlement by the name of "The Master Settlement Agreement." This settlement gives money to Utah every year for tobacco prevention and cessation efforts, along with the costs that tobacco costs the state. Unfortunately, Utah takes this money and puts it nearly everywhere BUT tobacco prevention. Tobacco prevention saves lives and money in Utah. It is too valuable to go. Please fight for its preservation.

I will end now. Know that I can go on and on, but will refrain for everyone's sake. Consider this a "Readers Digest" version. If you need clarification, statistics, etc., please, PLEASE let me know. I care for our beloved state of Utah and have its best interests in mind.

In closing, I want to say thank you for each and every legislator who has fought for the voice of their constituents. I want to thank you for hearing my concern and, in turn, being my voice up on Capitol Hill.

Fight the good fight.

Best Regards,
Peter Moosman

O Captain! My Captain!

Through fearful trips thou lead us onward.

Through thick and thin, till journey's end.

The anchors been dropped, but rises again,

O Captain! My Captain! Thy vision is wearing.

Setting sail in daunting times,

Fear is cast in the hearts of thy crew.

The prize sought has bred tyranny and demise.

O Captain! My Captain! Return to virtue.

From fearful trip, the victors ship masks what it has done.

Success, perhaps, yet the truth cries from its grave.

O Captain! My Captain! Whom I've been taught to revere.

No longer does thy authority preserve thee.

The captain may change but the message remains,

O Captain! My Captain! Let Madame Justice carry thy fate.

For thee we call; eager now for thy reply:

Wilt thou go down with the ship or without thy soul?

Around These Parts, It's Called "Growing Up"

A lot of my posts are about change. I suppose it may be due to the fact that I am changing: My [dis]likes, my style, my hobbies, etc.

Some say that it is because I am growing up. Whether that is true or not, I cannot say. Growing up or paying attention... whatever you wanna call it, it is happening.

With that said, the most recent acknowledgement to my "growing up" is a slight change in music likes... ok, lets get serious, it is solely dislikes. I have been listening to some music lately and thought, "you know what? I could never hear this band again and be completely ok with that." Let me share with you the list. Yes, THE LIST.

***Note: The bands mentioned below are all bands that I once listened to. Recently I have realized that, as mentioned above, "I could never hear this band again and be completely ok with that."***

Beastie Boys
"Sabotage" came on the radio the other day and I paused for a moment to listen to what was transpiring: The Beastie Boys are really obnoxious. End of story. They don't sing, but rather perform with a hybrid shout/whine/imitate a dying pig. There was so much random noise to serenade the awful tone of their voice that I had to change the station. Just then, all of their music replayed in my head, and it was far from a pleasant experience. My least favorite of the Beastie Boys is the song, "Girls." What a degrading, shallow, and tasteless piece of composition. Beastie Boys win the Most Obnoxious Music award.

Nirvana

Kings of Grunge, Nirvana is a poster-band for the 90's. Just like any other tragic death, Cobain's drove the band to new heights. If he would have maintained life, I am sure the band would have faded out quickly. Alas, it must have been the "clout" that Nirvana fans had in the music world that lead me to my acquaintance with the band, but I never seemed to connect with the obscure lyrics and what I consider to be the worst voice in music history.

Nine Inch Nails
I don't really have much to say about NIN, other than whenever they come on the radio, I find myself dry heaving and changing the station. All of their lyrics are negative and/or inappropriate, and the overall mood that is set while their music is playing is disheartening.

Jack Johnson
Every song is the same song with different lyrics. The same song. He might as well stop writing music and start with poetry. He has some decent lyrics at times, which could easily be transformed in some worthwhile poetry. Until then, maybe he can perfect his surfing skills.

Nickelback
'Nuff said.

Maroon 5
Their first hits were all about sex. I haven't really listened since, except for the fact that they are still writing cheesy love songs. They can't perform a decent show if their lives depended on it (yes, I have seen them live... and yes, I fell asleep at the show).

Owl City
I distinctly remember hearing Todd Nuke'em introduce "Fireflies" on the radio as one that reminds him of the Postal Service. I was stoked to hear it, because I highly enjoy anything Postal Service. I listened to "Fireflies" and loved it. I even loved it the second and third and fourth and fifth time. Shoot, I even enjoyed it the tenth time. So, I get my hands on a copy of the complete collection of Owl City, and was oddly surprised to hear the same song, over and over. Funny how that happens! The problem was, unlike Jack Johnson, the lyrics were absurd and pointless. You would almost wonder if Owl City is comprised of a guy in his parent's basement who wrote music on his computer in lieu of sleeping. Insomnia is a terrible thing...

Sublime
This is a bittersweet selection. To start off, I love their style. I love the genre and the feel. I just cannot stand the lyrics. The lyrics remind me too much of rap: sex, drugs, violence, repeat. Demoralizing women is their specialty (while high off drugs). Reinforcing stereotypes that men are shallow, drunk, and horny; that women are helpless sex slaves. Definitely not worth it. Sublime wins the As Tactless As Rap award.

Devo
Note to reader: I have never been a Devo fan, and never will be. I never had a period in my life that I listened to Devo music willingly. I just felt like they needed an honorable mention on my list. A band right out of the 70's who refuses to die, Devo decided to put out an album in 2010. Every time their single came on the radio, I had to scream, tweet about my disgust, and then scream again. Luckily for me, it disappeared as quickly as it surfaced.

---

Ok, when I decide I don't need something in my life any more, I tend to tear it to shreds. I apologize now for the negativity towards these musicians/bands, but it happened how it happened. I suppose I will provide a Like list in the future to act as a yin to this here yang.

Books, School, and Life - Not Necessarily in That Order.

Good news: I am changing my major. No longer am I pursuing Political Science, but rather Humanities. This is a more applicable major to my career/life objectives. Thoughts?

More good news: I survived my first week of school! It will be an interesting one, for sure. I nearly went crazy trying to figure out what I want to do with my life... Its my last semester before I graduate. Am I going to a 4 year institution? Am I staying at SLCC? Am I going on an adventure for a year? Fortunately, I think I have figured it out (with back-up plans)! It is amazing how much better I feel now.

Prayer works, thats for sure.

So, I am taking two Native American Studies classes, right? One is taught by a Native and the other is taught by a white couple. It is amazing how differently they approach the topic. To be honest, the white couple is driving me insane... They are teaching the class that all Natives are the same... same traditions, same ideologies, same language, etc.

IT.MAKES.ME.SICK.

Luckily I have the other class to keep things straight. :)

My Biology class is worrisome. Not only am I terrible at hard sciences, but the teacher seems like a difficult one. Needless to say, I can really use some prayers!


On a lighter note, I was asked to put some of my art in an art show the other day. It will be in April, and along side my work will be art of all shapes and sizes from other local artists and even a few from across the nation! Pretty cool, eh? The host of the art show: a local art blog, ArtDuh.com

------ Above: Journal Entry --------------------- Below: Thoughts and Ramblings ------

As of late, I have been fortunate to have some time to just storm through a few books [Compliments of the Great American Bathroom Book].

This morning, I read The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer. Yesterday and the day before, I read Generation X: Tales For An Accelerated Culture by Douglas Coupland, and Something Wicked This Way Comes by Ray Bradbury. Before that: Uncle Tom's Cabin by Harriet Beecher Stowe, Great Expectations by Charles Dickens, East of Eden by John Steinbeck (of which I wrote about in a previous post), and The Enigma of Suicide by George Howe Colt. Lets talk about a few of them!

Generation X: Tales For An Accelerated Culture
- Read this book.
- "People gripe that it's some horrible curse against society not to work a creepy job that has no loyalty to you and is killing you... But... I'm happy to know there are dreamers out on the edge, characters out of key, in and out of love, drifting, slightly twisted, still willing to listen - childlike and full of wonder with their world - people I would consider my friends."
- "Either our lives become stories, or there's just no way to get through them."
- "I can't remember whether I said thank you."

Something Wicked This Way Comes
- "They... change you so no one ever knows you again."
- The carnival was evil, and those in it survived by "living off the poison of the sins we do to each other, and the ferment of our most terrible regrets."
- The quotes above make an interesting connection to one another. First, the carnival survives off sins and regrets. The carnival then changes people, becoming unknown to others.
     This is our life, sans evil carnival. The more we dive into sins and regrets, the more we are changed. They create within us a monster that consumes our being and fills the void with Unknownness. A darkness is apparent - if not a physical change that occurs.
     Likewise, when one avoids sins and terrible regrets and pursues positivity and enlightenment, they are also changed. Only this change doesn't create a stranger, but rather a reliable and trustworthy "amigo-monger" (I totally just made that word up... love it. spread it.). Remove the repelling darkness and replace with the attractive light. Familiarity is created, as opposed to the unknownness from sin. INTERESTING!

Uncle Tom's Cabin
- Things to learn from Uncle Tom:
     - Rely on God, no matter how bad it gets.
     - Kindness first, regardless of the consequences.
     - Kindness second, regardless of the consequences.
     - Stand up for what you believe, even if you stand alone.
     - Your reward may not be instant, but it will be lasting.
          - "Think of your freedom every time you see Uncle Tom's cabin; and let it be a memorial to put you all in mind to follow in his steps, and be honest and faithful and Christian as he was."

I want to write a little bit about Great Expectations and The Enigma of Suicide, but I can't write any more today... Which is probably a good thing for both of us! This is, after all, a ridiculously long post. I would love for you to leave your thoughts, comments, questions, or concerns!

Cheers, yo.

Timshel

My mind has been racing NON-STOP today. Spirituality, life-paths, school, and the like have all taken a turn deep underneath this nasty mop of hair on my cranium.

I shall start with the obvious: School starts tomorrow. I am both excited an nervous. Excited for what the future will bring me this semester; nervous for the responsibilities and changes that will take place throughout and at its close. You see, I am taking some (hopefully) great classes:

- American Sign Language 2010

- Human Biology

- Native American Culture

- Native American Literature & Experience

Despite the greatness of most of these classes, this is my last semester before I graduate... Then I am kinda lost on what to do. I guess we will play it by ear for a while, eh?

---

Spirituality. My favorite thing ever. It is what drives me (or kicks my butt when I am not driving). I really need to get back to where I was on my mission. It will be hard, but hey, this is the year of the Rabbit! THIS IS MY YEAR!

Anyway... The other day I read East of Eden. And when I say that I read East of Eden, I really read a two-page summary out of the Great American Bathroom Book. It was mediocre at best. BUT something really got me thinking... Timshel.

Lets go back... Way back.

So there is a little family: Adam, Eve, children. Sound familiar? Two of the kids, Cain and Abel, make offerings to God. Abel's is accepted, Cain's is not. Then God asks Cain,

"If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? And if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his desire, and thou shalt rule over him." (vs. 7)

Now God mentions that he shall rule over sin. Some may interpret "thou shalt" as a promise that all men will conquer sin.

Next, we have the American Standard Version. Instead of "thou shalt rule over him," it has "do thou rule over it." This implies a commandment; an order from God. I think that this is a tad bit closer to what is correct, seeing as we are commanded to do many things. Yet, though we are commanded to do something, we are of the flesh - we are human. It is impossible in our state to succeed in such a feat as to completely rule over sin. In this case, we may find ourselves bargaining with God that "what you gave us was too hard. We were just incapable, so how could we even begin to try?"

OK, enough of me trying to make sense: I quote Steinbeck's East of Eden, 

"I wondered what the original word of the original writer had been that these very different translations could be made...

"Well, it seemed to me that the man who could conceive this great story would know exactly what he wanted to say and there would be no confusion in his statement...

"The American Standard translation orders men to triumph over sin, and you can call sin ignorance. The [KJV] makes a promise in 'Thou shalt,' meaning that men will surely triumph over sin. But the Hebrew word, the word timshel - 'Thou mayest' - that gives a choice. It might be the most important word in the world. That says the way is open. That throws it right back on a man. For if 'Thou mayest' - it is also true that 'Thou mayest not...

"Now, there are millions in their sects and churches who feel the order, 'Do thou,' and throw their weight into obedience. And there are millions more who feel predestination in 'Thou shalt.' Nothing they may do can interfere with what will be.  But 'Thou mayest!' Why, that makes a man great, that gives him stature with the gods, for in his weakness and filth and his murder of his brother he still has a great choice. He can choose his course and fight through and win."

[emphasis added]

So, here we are... in the 21st century, full of agency and consequences. This whole idea of timshel has kept me thinking... Though I have done a lot of stupid things (especially lately), and though I cannot choose the consequences of them, I can essentially choose my course and fight through and win.

2 Nephi 2:27

"Wherefore, men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto  man. And they are free to choose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil; for he seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself.

I wish I had more to say myself, instead of quoting others. But I can't. All I can say is that the ball is in my court [and yours]. We get to make the choices. For too long I have been making the wrong choices, but I am ready to make the change. 

Timshel, y'all.

[P.S. - One of the best bands - ever - wrote an AMAZING song called Timshel. Check it out: Timshel, by Mumford & Sons]

The only thing constant is change

When given time, a steady stream can create grand canyons out of smooth planes. The Saint can develop a calloused heart, while the Sinner can become the repentant prodigy. Alas, here I am, changed by those steady streams of life, the construction of the flesh and of the supernatural, covered in cracks, scars, and bandages - ready to keep changing.

With a new year and new resolutions, I thought it appropriate for a new look. I hope you like it. I would like to take a short moment to explain a thing or two regarding the change.

Memoirs of a Latter-Day Rogue is the title of a future compilation of writings on my seemingly peculiar musings. Though currently unwritten, each memoir will contain insight on what makes me me. With that said, I changed the title of my blog to coincide with said compilation because this blog will hopefully coincide with those musings.

If you take a gander back to the top of this here blog, you will see a bird flying near the title. Even thought it looks great and stylish, it has a special meaning. This special meaning will not be told in this post, but rather, told in a piece of literature published in 1970 - Jonathan Livingston Seagull. If you take the time to read it and apply it, I promise you that it will change you for the better. Believe dat.

Enough about me, go read the book.